Warrior Cats: The Four Clans

..l Bonjour mes amies! l..

WARNING: This journal may contain some vent/rant. Deal with it.

[rant/vent]

I can't take it any longer
Thought that I was stronger

My, my, it's been long since I cried so much. I'm probably dehydrating myself right now. I could die soon. I really could. But you know what? I don't give a damn. I could get run over by a cement-mixer-thingy, but I wouldn't care. My life just ain't worth living anymore. I tried being perfect, I really did. But it's not enough. Not enough for that dumbass drama-queen I call my mom, not enough for those two idiotic brothers of mine, not enough for my teachers who tried to help me, my friends who always tried their best to come to my aid, my dog who always stare at me with that sweet face, trying to comfort me, and pretty much everyone else I know.

All I do is linger
Slipping through my fingers

I need enlightenment, if you could all do me a favor. What did I ever do wrong to deserve such unfair treatment? I know others must be worst off then I am, but still. Being depressed just makes you selfish. It's a proven fact, I would know. I'm feeling like the most selfish, worthless, weak teenage girl ever. I know I'm all smiles, but I'm running out of them. Give me another reason to smile, and I just might comply.

I don't want to try now
All that's lefts goodbye to
Find a way that I can tell you

Still, I do have a few more reasons left to be happy. I just wish I had more. I hacking hate my family; they're no help at all. I failed history and math, but no one bothers to help with it. Instead, they insult me, call me worthless and stupid and lazy. Are you kidding me?! I work my hacking butt off every day just to satisfy everyone. My mom always told me when I was little to just be myself, and I took that advice with so much seriousness I'd probably explode. I love being myself, I really do. But you know what's weird? My mom doesn't love me, let alone like. Wasn't she the one who told me that I shouldn't act like some idiotic faker? Wasn't she the one who told me that I should follow my own plan, and do whatever fit me? Whenever she sees me drawing, she says that art is stupid and useless, that I shouldn't waste my time. She's a hacking slave-driver, even worst then George Bush and Adolf Hitler put together in one body.

I hate this part right here
I hate this part right here

And my brothers. OH GOD HELL IS HERE. You guys wouldn't last one minute with these two lowlife mongrels. Urrgh, one's an older jerk who beats me up for no good reason and who reeks like a year-old rotten dumpster, and the other's a bratty younger sibling with some serious mental problems. I'm surprised I survived for all these years, I really am. I guess the only thing that keeps me going is my love for all you people and my dad and my dog and my pals who stick up for me all the time. They don't leave me alone to lie in dust and rot 'till I'm sickly skinny. No, they would never. I know sincerity when I see it. And some people I don't even know just start hating me, mostly whenever I show everyone my "talents" [or so you guys call it]. It's not my fault that I'm so eager to learn. I want to know everything I can keep in my mind. I'm not trying to be smart, I'm just trying to learn.

I just can't take these tears
I hate this part right here

[//rant/vent]

On a brighter note, after finishing writing that, I feel slightly better. Venting really does help, neh? I hope not to put up that kind of stuff too often, but no promises. I promise to have more art/writes up as soon as I feel a bit more better. And pictures, too. <3




P TO THE S, YO:
Is it me, or has High School Musical killed the true magic of Disney? :/
After much begging from my HSM-obsessed friends, I saw the third movie. It was absolutely hacking HORRIBLE. Even my friends agreed. Good lord save me. There's a war going on in Iraq [or Iran, I forget], people are dying slowly and painfully, and all people are doing is drowning themselves in stupid movies like that. RAWRGH. *eats Zac Efron*



~Wishy, over and out. x3


[ EDITAMATATA ]
I'M CRUSHIIIIIING~
Weee~

L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very, extraordinary
E is even more then anyone that you adore~

NAT KING COLE FTW 8D


-- Edited by Emberpaw at 20:30, 2008-11-14

<3
Neee, if I could, I'd soak you in tears. x3

I'm really grateful for all your support, Vals. Neee, I just need to smile right now. x3 *grin*
Hey! Whadoyaknow! I guess we all find comfort in the strangest of ways. *coughcoughmydogcoughcoughcough*
Nai, I wish I could punch something right now. Preferably something annoying and mouse-brained... *glances at little bro* >w>;;

YAY FOR ANNOYING PEOPLE, WHO, STRANGELY ENOUGH, MAKE US FEEL BETTER~ *with the exception of my brothers -_-*

B'aw, you really think so? Am I really worth your praise? <:3


-- Edited by Emberpaw at 20:41, 2008-11-14

Lulz~

<3
I also have more guy friends then girl friends [neee]. The guys here are really sweet and adorkable, it sickens me. >x3
Nyeh, but most of the girls here have issues. LYKESRSLY. *hair-flip*
:B

And there's this really short but so darn cute and sweet guy who just dumped his girlfriend yesterday, and now all his ex-girlfriends' friends hate him. I seriously dun get why they hate him, HEART-BREAK HAPPENS, YA KNOWS. THEY ALL HAVE ISSEWS~ And he wasn't even rude or mean or just plain-on jerky, he was really sorry about breaking-up with her and so sincere and ahsjkfbckfbndjkc. D:

-- Edited by Emberpaw at 21:02, 2008-11-14

-- Edited by Emberpaw at 21:03, 2008-11-14

And I almost shouted, "You guys are idiots! Leave the boy alone, he's done nothing wrong!" But we were in Math class. So I kept from doing that because I valued my precious free-time. *coughdetentioncough* o_________________________________________o;;