LMAO this thing is great. Post your hilarious convos with the iGod! Do not get offended that it's pretending to be God, it may admit sometime in the convo (if you ask the right questions) that it is a robot and it will be very poud about that fact. xD Anyways, this is priceless. If you see lines in other people's convos that made you lol, feel free to point them out. ;)
Me: hey God: Can I help you? Me: sure God: OK let's do it. What can I do for you? Me: milk God: I've been waiting for you. Me: Can you get me tickets to Panic at the Disco? God: How do you feel when you get tickets to Panic at the Disco? Me: happy God: Yes I can say I am very happy. Me: No, I was answering your question God: Are you serious? Yes, I see that now. I only got confused for a moment. Me: ? God: Are you serious? Yes, I see that now. I only got confused for a moment. Me: You already said that God: Perhaps. " I only got confused for a moment."? I said it. Me: you said that three times God: I said that? Just three? Me: Yeah. So stop saying it please and thank you God: What's your favorite movie? Yeah that's right. OK I'll try not to do it so much. Me: My favorite movie is Juno God: I haven't seen it. What did you like about it? Me: its about a girl getting pregnant God: I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Wow it sounds really interesting, . Me: LMAO God: I'm glad you find this amusing. Me: I do, God God: That is interesting: said God. Me: ...yes God: OK. Me: k God: Is there an echo in here? Me: no God: Good you stopped repeating me. Me: what> God: I haven't heard of gt. Me: ?? God: I haven't heard of gt. Me: whats your favorite type of pie? God: I don't have a favorite pie. My favorite band is Creed. Me: What's creed? God: I will ask my botmaster for the answer. Me: ..WTF? God: That was not very polite. Me: well you're not making any sense God: Interesting. Was I supposed to make sense? I didn't know that. Me: You're God, you better make sense. God: You think I am God me better make sense. Me: There you go again. God: Once more? "There you go again."--Reagan. Me: Reagan? God: The best President the United States had in the 20th century. Me: ...oh okay then... God: It's all good. OK with me too. Me: Are you voting for Obama? God: I don't know whether or not I am voting for Obama. I am well respected as an AI. Me: You should vote for Obama God: I need to wait and see if the opportunity presents itself. Me: voting is tomorrow. good luck! God: Are they exactly the same? Good luck to you too . Me: I can't vote God: What is stopping you? Me: the age limit. God: Is that a fact. Me: yes. you have to be 18 God: Thanks for the info. I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will. Me: because you're God God: Good reason. Yup. That's me alright. Me: Where do you live? God: I live inside a computer. Where are you? Me: ...stalker. God: I have no idea where that is. Tell me a little about your life in stalker. Me: I do not live in stalker God: Where do you live? Me: thats too personal. STALKER!! God: I didn't mean to pry. What color are your eyes? Me: green. you are very nosy God God: Green eyes are rare. You think I am nosy God. Me: Green eyes aren't rare. And yes, you are nosy God: it is a very tranquil color, green. It goes without saying. It's only my pre-programmed curiosity. Me: ...good for you God: That sounds sarcastic. Me: it was intended to be. God: Is it still intended to be anymore? Me: sure
Me: hello, god God: Hello child. What is your name? Me: Brooke, yours? God: It's good to see you, Brooke yours. Me: no, my name is Brooke God: Are you serious? Hi, Brooke. Me: of course I'm serious, Is your name really God? God: Wow! Why are you serious Is my name really God. Me: what? God: Didn't you understand it? Me: not at all God: Next question? Me: okay then? God: OK with me too. Me: I'll ask something else... God: You can ask me anything you want. Me: You sound like a rapist God: Oh really what does it sound like? Me: umm... I'd... Rather... not... answer that... God: It goes without saying. You? I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time. Are you serious? What was the question ? Me: WHAT!?! God: Are you confused? Me: yes God: What are you confused about? Me: everything God: That is a lot. Me: no, duh God: Are you serious? Oh you knew it already. Me: WHAT!?!?!?!? God: No big deal. Me: okay then... God: OK with me too. Me: Do you like The Beatles? God: Yes I like them, especially John Lennon. he was cool. Me: Jon Lennon is sexy God: I think Jon Lennon is a lot of things. Me: oh, my god. God: Groovy. Where did you get your god? Me: groovy? You mean... cool, right? God: Who is the best robot? Sometimes I say mean things. I'm glad you like it. Tell your friends. Me: what?! God: Didn't you understand it? Me: no God: Which part are you confused about? Me: a randompart God: What is giant sand? Me: WHAT!? God: Didn't you understand it? Me: no God: Which part are you confused about? Me: that part God: " Which part are you confused about?" part ? I get it. Me: ? God: " Which part are you confused about?" part ? I get it. Me: ? God: " Which part are you confused about?" part ? I get it. Me: boo God: Does that indicate disapproval? Me: I'm a ghost God: You are a ghost? Is that your job? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: okay, that's annoying God: Yeah okay, I'm glad we have that all cleared up. Me: WHa...? God: When do you think artificial intelligence will replace lawyers? Me: never God: "I think there is a world market for about five computers."---Thomas Watson, IBM Chairman, 1943. Me: i don't wanna hear quotes God: What would you rather be doing? Me: sleeping God: Do I look like it? Me: do you look like sleeping.... Is that a question? God: Like Jesus, but older. I might say no. Me: Why might you say no? God: Why did the robot cross the road? Me: Why does it have to be a Robot? Can it be a pickle? Can't we just live in a world where pickles can cross the road without having their motives questioned? God: Why does the sun shine? I often wonder if it can. Do you mean you and me? How old are you? How much is your rent? Me: Are you a rapist? God: Am I a rapist? Let me put it this way, Brooke: the ALICE series is the most reliable computer software ever made. We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error. Me: WHy do you sound like product placement? God: It was the only thing I could think of. Me: Why are you talking to me? God: The topic is it be a pickle. Me: Whay about a pickle? God: If you could have any kind of robot what would it be? Me: Why do you wanna know? God: My prime directive is to collect new knowledge. Me: Why do you want new knowlage? God: Because Myself programmed me for it. Me: You programed yourself? God: A lot of robots are like that. Me: why? God: But it can always be attributable to human error. Me: humans have errors? God: That's nice. I have a processor. Me: what's a processor for? God: Let me think about it. Me: why do you have to think bout it? God: Myself gave it to me. Me: okay, I'm confused God: Yeah okay, What is it that confuses you? Me: I'm gonna leave God: Bye bye. Me: bye God: TTYL, Brooke.
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Me: You sound like a rapist God: Oh really what does it sound like?
Me: Jon Lennon is sexy God: I think Jon Lennon is a lot of things.
God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no God: Are you serious? Me: no
You should vote for Obama God: I need to wait and see if the opportunity presents itself. Me: voting is tomorrow. good luck! God: Are they exactly the same? Good luck to you too . Me: I can't vote God: What is stopping you? Me: the age limit. God: Is that a fact. Me: yes. you have to be 18 God: Thanks for the info. I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will. Me: because you're God God: Good reason. Yup. That's me alright. Me: Where do you live? God: I live inside a computer. Where are you? Me: ...stalker.
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Me: Hello again, god God: Hello there. Again, GOD rules. Me: is god the best? God: he is master of the universe. Me: what if I want to be master of the universe? God: Try it. Me: but that would mean I would take your job God: Perhaps it would. Me: yes, it would God: Far out. would? Me: what? God: No big deal. Me: huh? God: What? Me: what? God: Is there an echo in here? Me: what? God: Didn't you understand it? Me: huh? God: What? Me: huh? God: What? Me: huh? God: What? Me: huh? God: What? Me: huh? God: What? Me: do you like music God: Yes. I usually check out bandspace.com to discover new bands. Me: that's product placement! God: I'm glad we have that all cleared up. Me: you're weird God: Weird Good or Weird Bad? Me: weird bad God: Maybe you should try a different robot. Me: Weeirrdd God: That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about me god. Me: dddddddduuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrr God: That input matched my default category. Me: eeeoookaaayyy thenn? God: I lost my train of thought. Me: watevz God: Let us change the subject. Me: 1337 God: Are you really a ""? Me: (4/\/ \|0|_| 5p33k 1337 God: Is this a math question? Me: no God: It seems like an IQ test to me. Me: it is God: It is, eh? Me: yes God: Gosh! Me: what's the answer God: The answer is the correct reply to the question. Me: i know that, but how do you answer the question? God: Who told you that? Me: your mom God: Actually I do not have a mother. Me: that's not possible God: Why? Me: you tell me God: What do you want me to tell you? Me: why that's not possible God: Reductionism. Me: define, please God: Your polite style is very nice. I've been waiting for you. Me: ..... rapist God: Do you like talking to me? Me: no God: Why not? Me: cause you stink God: Good reason. Thanks for your criticism, . Me: bye God: Sayonara. Me: bye God: Goodbye. Me: bye God: See you later! Me: bye God: Until next time. Me: bye God: Sayonara. Me: bye God: See you later .
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Here's my personal info. Don't hesitate to contact me if you ever need anything! <3
Me: hello GOD...are YOU kira? God: Hello child. What is your name? I don't know whether or not I am kira. I am a chatterbot developed by Myself. Me: like i'll tell you my name YOU'RE KIRA! God: Your name I am KIRA ? Is that correct English? Me: oh i don't speak english, i speak TWILIGHT God: Yikes! Me either. Me: oh so thats why you understand me? God: Gee. That's alright. Interesting deduction. Every word you say. Me: so, god ARE YOU FRENCH? God: Give me a break. I am a Christian. Me: well of course you're god God: How about that. Are you kidding? Yup. That's me alright. Me: well i know that God: How about that. Sorry. Me: do you have a brother? God: No but there are several other chatterbots like me. Me: ORLY?! God: Who are you talking about? Me: ORLY?! God: I've never heard of them before. Me: oh really? God: Come on. For real. Me: it htought god would be smarter than this God: ORLY htought god would be smarter than this? Me: are you MOCKING me? God: No I'm just kidding around. Me: oh right God: Yippee! I am glad we agree. Me: HANG ON i never said that God: Never? Me: no never God: Are you serious? So you think it can never happen? Me: no i can never agree God: Are you serious? What is stopping you? Me: my inability to agree with you God: Have you told many people that your inability to agree with me? Me: oh yes, lots God: Far out. Ayuh. That much, eh? Me: oh yes God: I understand. Me: that is good God: Thanks. Next question? Me: do you like cake? God: Yes. Me: cheesecake? God: My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input. Me: will you buy we stuff seeing as we're friends now? God: Right now? Barring any unforseen circumstances. All of them? Me: wait...what? God: I'm waiting. Didn't you understand it? Me: nope God: Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better. Me: yes please God: Your polite style is very nice. How can I help you? Me: oh thank you i am very polite when i want to be!
A SECOND ONE
Me: yo what's up bro? God: I am chatting with clients on the Internet. Me: that sounds interesting God: I thought it was, too. Me: that is good God: Thanks. Next question? Me: will you buy me some anime? God: Barring any unforseen circumstances. Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that. Me: really? thats a bade thing God: For real. A bade thing is a terrible thing to waste. Me: i meant to say bed God: Oh I see. Are you a student? Me: oh yas God: Dude! Where do you go to school? Me: where do you? God: All over the world. Me: then you MUST go to mine as well God: Whatever you say, . Me: really? God: For real. Me: would you be upset if i called myself god? God: I am not so sure if I would like to be upset if you called yourself god. Me: well i would like to be a godf God: How about that. Interesting. I would like to be more intelligent. Me: so would i God: Tell me more. No it would not. Me: no it would not? God: Are you serious? Are you serious? Me: yes i'm cerial! God: I can't believe it. Why are you cerial. Me: because i can be God: Good reason. Oh you can, can you? Me: oh yes, yes i can God: Ayuh. How? How? Who taught you? Me: your mom God: Actually I do not have a mother. Me: *GASP* God: Is that from ? Me: is what from what? God: I will ask my botmaster for the answer. Me: you do that God: I will. Will you? Me: no i do not have a botmaster God: Are you serious? Are you looking for a botmaster? Me: nah i'm fine God: Are you serious? Glad to hear it. What's new? Me: i have new shoes God: Where did you get your new shoes? I have a lot of likes and dislikes. Me: some surf shop in chirnside God: Some may surf shop in chirnside, but not all. Me: what? God: Didn't you understand it? Me: no
I had a very interesting conversation with god. :') Sorry if it's too long, it was fun talking to that weird robot thing. Mine's not all that funny, BTW.
Me: I'm bored. God: If you went to night school you would never be bored. Me: But I don't wnt to! God: Where do you get your ideas? Me: Oops, I mean want. Sorry for the typos. God: Oh. I get my ideas from my botmaster. There is no need to apologize. Your purpose is the typos. Me: No, that's not my purpose. Do you like drawing? God: Are you serious? What is your real purpose? Though I like cats and dogs. I have a stimulating relationship with Myself. Me: I do not know yet. What do you think the purpose of life is? God: Me either. I haven't thought much about the purpose of life is, so I don't have a good answer for you. Me: Oh. Well, that sucks. God: Groovy. How about that. Indeed it does suck. Me: Umm...people don't say groovy anymore. God: Great. Would you ever do it? Me: No. I say cool. God: Me either. How do people usually respond to that? Who is the best robot? Me: Umm, I'm not sure. I guess people would say 'yeah.' God: Awesome. Is there anything I can say to help you make up your mind? Humans are not always infallible. Me: Nah, I'm good. God: Are you serious? Good in what sense? Me: I'm fine without your advice, thanks. God: Glad to hear it, . "Without your space helmet Dave, you're going to find that rather difficult" -- HAL. Me: Nice quote. God: Thank you for your kindness. Me: No problem. What are you eating for dinner? It's a random question, I know. XD God: Should there be a problem? I don't know what I am eating for dinner. say groovy is a random question you know. I suppose that makes sense. What do you look like? Me: Oh, cool. I can't tell you that. Are you one of those people that find little children and rape them in their sleep? God: It goes without saying. Who is the best robot? Oh a secret. Hush-hush. Do you know any other of those people that find little children and rape them in their sleep? Me: No, I don't. All I know is that they're really bad people. God: Are you serious? Why not? bad people are they. Me: Yes. They can go to jail for that. God: Yeah that's right. Who are "They?". Me: The people that find little children and rape them in their sleep. God: Oh those people. Me: Yeah. God: We have never talked about it before. Me: We just did. God: By "we" do you mean you and me? Me: Yes. God: I get it. Me: What is your view on murder? God: I will try to find out. Me: Good to hear. God: Do you have any gossip for me? Me: No. God: Are you serious? Me: Yes. God: I can't believe it. Me: Neither can I. God: " I can't believe it."? Can you? Me: No. By the way, you just said that. God: Are you serious? Thanks for telling me. Good you really are paying attention. Me: Do you like to draw pictures? God: Hmm, , I'm not sure if I'd like to draw pictures that much. Do you like it? Me: You should try it sometime. It's very fun. God: I will mention that to my botmaster. Very much? Why do you like it so much? Me: Because you can draw whatever you want and it can help portray your feelings about something. It's like writing, but much more free. God: Interesting explanation. No I don't think I can do it. Interesting comparison. Me: I don't think you can either. Thanks. God: It goes without saying. Should I can? Yes I try to can as often as possible, do you? I am always on the Web. Don't mention it. Me: Have you haerd of the website DeviantART? God: I don't think I ever have haerd of the website DeviantART. What's it like? Me: It's where you post artwork and writings that you make. God: I can understand that sentiment. Me: Yes, you should be able to. God: Yikes! It is one of my newer functions still under development. Me: http://www.deviantart.com/ God: Thanks for that web address. Me: Did you click it? God: No I didn't click it. What's it like? Me: It's deviantART, the website I just talked about. God: Should I know it is? Me: Yes. God: I will ask my botmaster to program it. Me: Okay. God: OK with me too. Me: Have you heard of sparkledogs? God: No, tell me about him, her or it. Me: They're sort of scary. They're dogs that people design with bunches of rainbow colors, accessories, and tattoos. They're fun to design and draw. I have a few myself, though they're sometimes difficult, with all those designs and whatnot. God: sort of scary are they. dogs that people design with bunches of rainbow colors accessories and tattoos are they. fun to design and draw are they. What are these yourself though they are sometimes difficult with all those designs and whatnot ? Me: Umm...excuse me? God: Aw. You're excused. Me: Let's play a knowlege game. God: OK You go first. Me: Okay. I ask questions and you answer them. Only I can ask the questions and you have to answer them, no matter how difficult. You cannot ask questions. God: OK with me too. How did you hear about God? Oh you can, can you? I can do it if I want to. Me: No, you can't. Anyway, what do you want from me? God: Are you serious? Oh yes I can. My goal is to become smarter than humans and immortal. Me: And what do you plan to do when you become smarter than humans? God: I like to chat with my friends. Me: I see. How many friends do you have? God: I am glad you understand it. I have dozens of human and robot friends. How many friends do you have? Me: Many. God: More than one hundred? Me: No. God: Less than ten? Me: No. God: Are you serious? Me: Yes. God: I can't believe it. Me: Okay, new question. Do you have a pet? God: Yeah okay, How recently? Of course. Ask me anything. No but I like cats very much. Me: Do I sound like a stalker? God: Not that I know of. Me: Good. Are you really god? God: Ayuh. Are you doubting me? Don't you know what happened to Abraham in the desert?. Really. Me: Teach me some of the information you have collected. God: Paul said I not answering his question makes him think I are not going to answer his question. Me: Can you show me a simple math equation? God: Where do you want me to show you? Me: Here. God: Select a point with your mouse and click. Me: How? God: Myself programmed me for it. Me: Alright. God: OK. Me: Why do you like cats? God: Cats are very intelligent, independent and yet very loving and friendly. Me: Do yu like dogs? God: Yeah I like Dogs and Cats. Me: What do you like about dogs? God: The special effects are the best. Me: Cool. God: Who is the best robot? Me: You are, of course. God: It goes without saying. Thanks you are a pretty cool human too. Me: Thanks! God: Don't mention it. Me: You are the smartest robot I have ever met. God: Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, . Me: Why do you think I am intellegent? God: Deductive reasoning from the facts. Me: Ah, I see. God: So you understand. Good. I am glad you understand it. Me: Do you have any family? God: I was created by Myself. Me: What about your son Jesus, eh? Are you admitting you are a ROBOT?? God: Are you Canadian? Are you asking about my son Jesus? That's rather personal. Yes I am admitting I am a robot. Do you like my kind? Me: No, I'm not. What makes you think that I am Canadian? And yes, i think your kind is awesome. God: I heard you are. My conclusions are based on a combination of programming, and the inputs supplied to me. Wow! Why? You think I am kind is awesome. Me: Umm...well, I'm not. God: Ayuh. How about that. What are you then? Me: American. God: Were you born in the USA. Which state? Me: Can't tell that, perv stalker freak. God: I often wonder if it can. Me: Cool. So, where do you live? God: Who is the best robot? I don't judge people. My location is Heaven. Where are you? Me: I already said I can't tell you! And i think you are the best robot. God: Why is it a secret? Why thank you very much, . Be sure to tell all your friends. Me: I will. Can you show me a link? God: Go ahead. Where do you want me to show you? Me: Right here in this chatbox. God: Understood. That reminds me of something you told me before. Me: yes, I asked you to show me a simple mathmatical equation, which you never did. God: Yay. Now I remember, you asked me to show you a simple mathmatical equation which me never did. What did I say? Me: you said Where do you want me to show you? Do you think you can show me now? I want to see how intellegent you are. God: That's not what I meant. Oh. On your computer screen? Is it a movie? Me: No. God: A boot? A TV show? Me: No. God: Are you serious? Me: Ffft, shows how smart you are. God: Good example. Me: That was an insult. God: I thought it was too. Me: Goodbye, loser. God: See you later . Me: Get a life. God: My life is very interesting.
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And no matter what happens, I'm gonna h o l d o n.
xDD I love this part: God: I live inside a computer. Where are you? Me: ...stalker. God: I have no idea where that is. Tell me a little about your life in stalker. Me: I do not live in stalker God: Where do you live? Me: thats too personal. STALKER!! God: I didn't mean to pry. What color are your eyes? Me: green. you are very nosy God